Have you ever met someone and they instantly took your breath away ? I mean you fell completely in love at first sight, and as time passed it felt like you met your soul mate? Everything was so perfect and you actually felt so safe and secure and you knew this was it ? Then one day it was like a switch flipped and your perfect bubble of peace and happiness turned out to be hell on earth. When it’s all over, said and done, you think back and realize that there were signs you should have picked up on. Things that in hindsight you should have noticed was leading to the ultimate demise of your once perfect relationship. Here are 5 signs *obviously there’s more but these are my 5* that you’re in a toxic relationship and you need to get out and move on.
It’s All GIVE, NO TAKE– You realize that you’re the one giving 100% of everything. No matter what it is, it’s always you giving and never getting the same energy reciprocated. There’s no compromising. Whether it’s time, money etc.. no relationship should be one person doing everything. It’ll leave you drained and feeling like you did nothing but waste time.
THERE’S A LACK OF TRUST– Lemme let y’all in a on a secret. If you don’t have trust in ANY relationship it’s not gonna go anywhere. You can stay in a relationship with no trust but I promise you, it won’t flourish into anything !! Been there done that and never again. If you can’t trust the person you’re with, you need to seriously evaluate why you’re even with them.
THEY’RE UNRELIABLE– They make plans with you and cancel at the last-minute. (Or don’t show up at all). They have hit you with every excuse in the book as to why they couldn’t see you or hang out. Even when it’s plans made in advance or something important, they forever leave you hanging and never make it. Eventually you’ll realize that everything and anything takes precedence over you. Trust me, it won’t get better. Once they start curving you more often than not, just leave. The disappointment you feel isn’t worth it.
YOUR FRIENDS/ FAMILY DON’T LIKE THEM – Now honestly I debated with this one. On one hand, when we’re in love with someone we don’t care if anyone likes them or not. Our opinion is the only one that matters. But lately I’ve noticed when everyone in your circle says the same thing about them, you should take note. They obviously see things that you’re too blind to see. If you find yourself avoiding talking about your relationship to your friends and family or even bringing your partner around, think about why. Everyone isn’t gonna say the same thing for no reason.
And last but not least,
THEY REFUSE TO CHANGE – That whole “It’s just the way I am” is a bunch of bullshit. When people want something to work, they find ways to make it work. Don’t let anyone tell you that they’ve been this way or you knew what you was getting into. If he/she refuses to acknowledge the things that are hurting you or even attempt to change them, you need to go. It’s not gonna get any better.
Honestly, I’ve been here more times than I can count. I never saw the signs until it was too late. Being able to see a situation for what it is, and accept that it isn’t going to change is a blessing. I know it may seem hard to just leave something that you invested your time and energy into. But trust me there’s always something better around the corner. Don’t settle because of the amount of time you spent with someone. Toxic is toxic period. Always remember to stay true to your values and who you are. The sooner you remove yourself from this relationSHIT, you’ll be able to find the person that is meant for you.